The Success of Failure

TITLE: THE SUCCESS OF FAILURE
DATE: 14 Nov 2011
Written by: Conrade Yap

“You know, brothers, that our visit to you was not a failure.” (1 Thess 2:1)

MAIN POINT: The world measures success in terms of financial profits, pleasurable gains, and worldly acquisitions. The Christian rises above the paradigms of success and failure, to begin at the cross of Christ, which is foolishness to the world, a stumbling block to many. In other words, Christians see success and failures using a different measurement.

Aaron Feuerstein was a Jewish businessman. Like many, he did not enter into business to fail. He wanted to make money out of it. He desired to inject meaning in what he works. He aimed to live faithfully according to the Torah. For close to a century, his family had devoted their lives to supporting the economy in their hometown in Lawrence, Massachusetts. This company is Malden Mills, one of the largest textile companies in the state of Massachusetts. As CEO, Feuerstein was the third generation member to manage the innovative and reputable company.

Fire at Malden Mills, Lawrence, Massachusetts, 1995

On the night of Dec 11th, 1995, the sprawling factory ended up in smoke, in one of the biggest fires ever in Massachusetts. While there were no casualties, the damage to the economy in the town was immense. Without a factory, there will be no production. Without output, there is nothing to sell and there will not be any revenues. Without revenue and work, there is no justification in keeping the 3000 employees. The fire burned up not only the factory and jobs. It burned up hopes amid a difficult economy.

The Better Way

Title: The Better Way

Author: Conrade Yap (20 Jan 2010)

“"Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her." (Luke 10:42)

One of the hardest things to experience is to be an unknown. I remember a time when I was doing cold-calls to new customers in my sales portfolio. At one famous firm, the gatekeeper to the CEO, a secretary curtly says to me: “I don’t even know you.”  Earnest pleas simply fall on uninterested ears. No matter what I say or show, nothing can convince the secretary to let my team meet the big boss. Being an unknown in any industry is tough. Nobody knows you. Nobody wants your products. Small unknowns begin with a serious disadvantage compared with giant corporations with offices worldwide. Big doors remain shut to unknown midgets like me. Many things of this world belong to the rich and the famous, or the well connected.

Facing Rejection

In contrast, when we start throwing big names we are associated with, people pay attention. In the public arena, this is the common practice. An unknown author co-writes a book with a famous name and the book sells by the thousands. An unknown actor become famous when associated with an Oscar winner. An unknown product gets the publicity when endorsed by a rich celebrity.

Another way to avoid rejection is to work in a famous company. I remember among my MBA friends, that one of the most sought after jobs are in the investment banking industry and management consulting companies.  Just becoming an intern in a blue chip firm like Accenture (formerly Anderson Consulting) or any of the Big 4  (used to be at least 8) accounting firms is a ticket to professional stardom. I remember trying for one but fail to get beyond the first interview. Facing rejections is one of the hardest pills to swallow. On hindsight, I think I may have given myself too much big-headed pride to even expect to get a shot at the rich-and-famous. It is simply not for me.

In times like these, I take refuge in knowing that someone will always accept me. Of course my family will stick with me regardless. I know friends who are willing to put aside their fame and big celebrity status, to shake hands with a small unknown like me. For a reject like me, simply being accepted is a big achievement already. People who work with children with disabilities share that there is a public misconception that disability is a disease. In fact, people with disabilities are not exactly asking for a cure. The majority simply asks for something simple: Acceptance. Acceptance is a path toward the better way. We begin to address rejection by first accepting ourselves, and to know that the LORD accepts us as we are.

Martha and Mary

I have preached on this famous Martha-Mary story before. After my sermon, a lady in the congregation actually came up to thank me for giving her a new insight to this old familiar passage. I was talking about NOT comparing busy Martha with contemplative Mary.  It is in desiring Jesus, regardless of our Marthalike-state or Marylike-behavior. Like what many adults will say: “There is no right or wrong answer.” My point then was Jesus accepts us as we are. It is not what we ‘do’ that interests him. It is who we are that attracts him. Jesus looks at the heart. In other words, the story is not about choosing a contemplative lifestyle over a busy lifestyle. It is about choosing Christ, regardless of our busy or contemplative moods. In other words, the key at the foot of Christ is to begin WHERE WE ARE. It is in feeling accepted. The better way is the way of acceptance. Mary chose the better way, to be accepted as she is in Christ.

Martha seeks to find acceptance through the many household chores she do. When she realizes that she is the only one doing them, instead of speaking to Mary directly, she talks past her sister to ask Jesus to ‘tell’ her sister to help her. There is a tinge of unhappiness that Mary is doing nothing, while she is doing everything. For many of us, we understand where Martha is coming from. If everyone sits down like Mary, who is then going to prepare food for the important guests? However, what we miss is the attitude of the heart behind the request. Martha is already allowing her unhappiness to fester on, toward a dislike for her dear sister. This attitude is demanding and in some ways, self-centered. For Martha, the ‘right’ way is her way. It is her stubborn refusal to consider other ways that Jesus has to intervene by saying; Mary has chosen the better way, in Christ.

Being Accepted in a World of Strangers

In life, we are measured by what we do, almost all the time. Externally, it is very tough being a nobody especially in careers that require high visibility and salesmanship.  Internally, it is worse to envy others more successful than us. Sometimes, I too wish that I am better known. When this happens, I remind myself with these questions:

• “Can you handle success?"
• "Are you able to handle fame and fortune and still remain humble?”
• "Will you be spoilt by success?"
• "Will God's Name be better glorified through your strengths? Or your weakness?"

When we switch our infatuation with the world, and to start moving toward contentment in God, we are on the right track to the better way. I am encouraged by the Canadian evangelical writer, and current pastor of Moody Church, Dr Erwin Lutzer who writes:

‘Better to love God and die unknown than to love the world and be a hero; better to be content with poverty than to die a slave to wealth; better to have taken some risks and lost than to have done nothing and succeeded at it; better to have lost some battles than to have retreated from the war; better to have failed when serving God than to have succeeded when serving the devil. What a tragedy to climb the ladder of success only to discover that the ladder was leaning against the wrong wall.’ (Erwin Lutzer, Failure: The Backdoor to Success, Moody, 1998, p136)

Lutzer's description of the better way blows me away! What a reminder that it is better to be an unknown in the world, and to be accepted in God. What a reminder that contentment is better than great riches. What a revelation to check our ladders, whether they are leaning on the right wall in the first place. The key to the better way begins by not being distracted by the world. Neither is it trying to gain acceptance by doing lots of big projects in the name of God. The key to the better way is in the simple knowledge that God loves us as we are. God loves us regardless of our size and shape of our achievements. God loves us, as we sit at Jesus’ feet, simply adoring him.

Your Choice of a Better Way

Are you struggling with the issue of being accepted in your workplace, your home or any particular comminity group? Do not despair, my brothers and sisters. Even when you encounter failures, or when you feel rejected by those you respect, you know that God accepts you. In Christ, He has already accepted you, before you were conceived. Jesus loves you just as you are, especially when you come with a humble and contrite heart. Remember, the better way is not in terms of which path to take, but the attitudes you wear before the throne of grace. 

“The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.” (Ps 51:17)

Thought: The ways of the LORD are infinitely better than the waywardness of the world.

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Priority Setting - Idol's Style or God's

FOCUSING ON UNIMPORTANT THINGS

"For I tell you, none of those men who were invited shall taste of my dinner." (Luke 14:24)

If someone invites us for a meal, will we say no? For some of us, it depends on our availability? For others, it depends on whether we have other 'more important things' (MIT) to do. Yet, many will depend on who is the one inviting us? In the parable of the Dinner, Jesus points out the various kinds of people who have their own priorities mixed up. It is a parable in response to one of his disciples who said optimistically:

"Blessed is everyone who will eat bread in the kingdom of God!" (Lk 14:15b)

The truth is, before one can eat, they have to come for the meal. In reply, Jesus lists out the people who put other things as more important compared to dining as an honored guest in the kingdom of God. The dinner was sumptuous. Notices were sent out ahead of time. On the day itself, the master even sent his servant to personally call the invited guests to come. Unfortunately, all started making excuses. They already knew about the dinner. Their hearts are unwilling. One said that he needs to tend his new piece of land (Lk 14:18). Another said that he needs to try out his five yoke of oxen (Lk 14:19). Yet another one said he has to attend to his new wife (Lk 14:20). All of them gave excuses NOT to go for the dinner. The first put property a priority. The second put his possession first. The third put his partner before everything else. All of them thought they had focused rightly on their MIT.

Priority Setting - Idol Style
It is not difficult for us to see why not. Isn't taking care of our work important, like the man tending the land? Isn't stewarding our resources part of our responsibilities on earth, like the man trying his new oxen? Isn't spending time with our spouses necessary, like the newly married person in the parable?

The point about the parable is not about stewardship or taking care of what God has given to us. It is about an open invitation to enter the kingdom of God. What is most important to man, is not necessarily the most important to God. God's smallest step is infinitely more important than man's biggest leap. Many people say that it is God's will for them to focus on the more important things in life. What if they are wrong? What if we have placed all our eggs in one basket called MIT, and ignore the rest? What if we have lost our ability to know what is MIT?

In business, MIT priorities are seductive. It makes us so mindful of the majority that we forget the minority. It makes us play the numbers game and promotes favouritism. It causes us to make unfair decisions between the have's and have-nots, like choosing to dine with the rich and ignore the poor. MIT policies discriminates and absolute practice of MIT discriminates absolutely. In our spiritual walk, when our MIT becomes an idol, we worship the idol. We say yes to the idol and no to God.

When our priorities get mixed up, we cannot distinguish which is idol-driven and which is God-led. We misinterpret signs. David Allen, author of the best-selling book "Getting Things Done," observes how people practice the 80/20 principle. This principle essentially refers to 80% of the profits from 20% of the customer base, or 80% of the job done by 20% of the resources. This leads many in the management to focus on the 20%, and in the process neglect the other 80%. Allen goes on to point out that such 'focus on the important' is one of the main culprits behind our current global financial crisis. He comments that the smartest people of the world focused 'too' much attention on the so-called more important things in their lives. Overemphasizing 20% star performers and undermining the other 80% is a fatal formula for eventual collapse of the corporation. MIT syndrome can also happen the other way; of blame.

The MIT Scandal
It does not take long for us to see the truth behind Allen's observations. In the aftermath of the Madoff scandal, where many investors were hoodwinked into losing more than $50 billion, people pointed fingers at the US New York securities watchdog, the SEC, in particular, Meaghan Cheung, for failing to uncover irregularities with Madoff's company. My question: How can we pin the blame solely on one person who is trying to do her job according to the system? Yes, Cheung may have been a lawyer trained in Yale. She may be very experienced with auditing big firms. However, is the problem because of a person or because of a system? Chances are, it is easier to point a finger at a person rather than a system.

I believe things do not simply collapse overnight. People can spend many hours building a big strong brick house quickly but on a weak foundation. All it takes is one big windstorm, and the entire house will be crushed by its own weight once the substructure beneath is destroyed.

In a money driven world where profits are considered 'more important,' what about the 'less important' aspect of employee relationships? In a bureaucracy where sticking to the rules are necessary to maintain order, what about the 'less important' creativity among standard procedures? Are we too caught up with numbers, that the 20% star players become more important than 80% majority? Can a star striker win a football game all by himself? The answer is clear. We need a team, both stars as well as ordinary folks.

In the kingdom of God, there is no distinction between more important or less important people. In the parable, it is the rich in possessions, the gainfully employed and the busy married person who refused the master's invitation to dine. For them, attending a dinner is less important than possessions, property or partner. The master then extended the invitation to all others, stating that those who reject his invitation shall not eat at his table.

Have we rejected God's invitation to dine? More importantly, have we made our own version of "MIT" (more important thing) into a stubborn doctrine? Are we too idol-driven that we fail to listen to God's prompting? God does not play favourites. Neither does he look at statistical tables before making a decision to invest. He sees the hearts. He sees people, not numbers. He invites all to come and dine with him. Will we say yes to him, or say 'no' by putting the M.I.T in between God and ourselves? Remember. MIT (or LIT) does not always come first. God's leading must come first.

THOUGHT: What do you make of God's commandment: "Thou shalt have no other gods before me?" Will the MIT we put first slowly turn into an idol that puts God last?

"The glory of God, and, as our only means to glorifying Him, the salvation of human souls, is the real business of life." (CS Lewis, Christian Reflections)

sabbathwalk

Quick and Good (lies in Being Prepared)

A Quick and Good Society

"And he will go on before the Lord, in the spirit and power of Elijah, to turn the hearts of the fathers to their children and the disobedient to the wisdom of the righteous—to make ready a people prepared for the Lord." (Luke 1:17)

I remember a time when many people, including Christians, lambast our culture of instant gratification. They complain about the way people rush through life expecting immediate returns for instant gratification. They lament the deterioration of relationships that were impacted by such a instant mentality. Whether it is through the pen or via the pulpit, the effect is similar. People despise instant gratification mentality, yet they often are the very practitioners of such an attitude. When the pack of chips fail to be released within 5 seconds, we start rocking the snacks machine. When a web page fails to load quick enough, we re-fresh the same page several times. When we ring customer service and if the call is not picked up within 3 rings, we get irritated. A complaint typically goes like this;

“In our culture of instant gratification, instant news, instant download, instant coffee, instant everything, who has the time to practice the virtue of waiting?”

Even movie stars, whose lives are hyper-busy, learn to inject humor amid the sarcasm. Meryl Streep, an emmy award movie star says:

"Instant gratification is not soon enough."

Not to be outdone, Carrie Fisher claims,

"Instant gratification takes too long." (Carrie Fisher, of Star Wars fame)

JK Jones, a Professor at Lincoln Seminary gives a typical evangelical response to the topic of instant gratification.

"Our society does not tend to applaud the long obedience required to conform to the image of Jesus. We live in a time of instant gratification. If something can't be done quickly, we often find ourselves uninterested. The computer, as wonderful as it is, has helped to foster a spirit of importance. If we can't get on-line quickly or find that web site immediately, we become frustrated, even angry." (JK Jones, Reading With God in Mind, Heartstring Publishing, 2003, p49)

Essentially, the key point in his book is that one reads in order not to be alone. In other words, when we crouch up on our favourite chair to read, we are participating in the words and lives of the author who write the book, as well as the Spirit of God leading our thoughts. Jones applies this instant mentality to the way that we read books. I feel that we can also apply the same principle to how we read modern culture. Are we reading our modern culture with a learning attitude? Are we reading modern culture with Someone in mind?  One famous quip among my business colleages is:

"The deadline for this project is yesterday." (meaning you're already late so hurry up.)

Let me offer a futuristic equivalent. "The LIFEline of our project on earth is tomorrow." (meaning, we need to live our present lives based on a hopeful tomorrow.)

Indeed, we cannot live on the fuel of yesterday. Neither do we concern ourselves only with the matters of today. We live on the basis of a better tomorrow. In other words, if there is no tomorrow, why hope at all? We prepare ourselves in our heads and hearts for the kingdom of heaven to come. We get ready for our Coming King who will arrive in glory and full honor. When the time comes, we must be ready to be quick-and-good for the Coming king.

Positive Side of Quick-and-Good
If you are like me, you will recognize the negative fallout of a quick-fix society. People become more impatient, in turn testing the patience of others. Drivers insist on their right of way, leading to rude honks and ugly stares. Customers demand immediate and high quality attention, else they walk. However, let us pause and think. Is quick-and-good mentality all bad and absolutely no good? No. There are still some virtues. Key to a quick-and-good story is something very elementary: Being Prepared.

Quick-and-good makes good business sense. Who wants to queue up for a plate of fish and chips when one can get another faster? Just take a look at the popularity of fast-food restaurants. If we were to think about it, restaurants like McDonald’s, Burger King, KFC pride themselves as specialists in the business of quick-and-good. Quick-and-good is a highly important attribute for businesses that operate within a tiny window of opportunity. If 80% of the daily revenue comes from the lunchtime crowd hours of 12 to 2pm, will it not make sense to maximize production at these hours? A quick look at the processes behind fast food production reveals a trick behind their efficiency. Many things were pre-cut, pre-packed and even pre-cooked. Pop drinks like Coca-Cola and Sprite come in ready to use canisters. Timers constantly beep when each batch of French fries are ready. Meat patties were ready cut and the oven kept at a temperature for immediate cooking. Bread is pre-sliced and ready to be served. Kids’ toys are all prepacked. The whole process is so meticulous that even cleaning duties in the entire restaurant is regimented at frequent intervals. Leaving nothing to chance, many fast food restaurants pride themselves in a quick-and-good image, to satisfy the cultural craving of instant gratification.

Be Prepared
Although I dislike a culture of instant gratification, there is also much to learn from the quick-and-good wisdom behind the successes of McDonalds, KFC and other fast-food corporations. (Maybe some people may say quick but not good, but that is another story altogether.) Businesses often do scenario planning and different what-if’s situations. What if a busload of schoolchildren rush into the restaurant during lunch hour? What if a slow inexperienced cashier is holding up the line? What if the bread runs out? For these reasons, I admire business corporations for their aptitude in addressing these different scenarios. Sophisticated planners will even examine the daily sports page to anticipate surges in demand from delivery calls or rushing traffic to a nearby stadium where the restaurant serves. Key to every success in fast-food restaurants is the attitude of readiness and an aptitude of "Being Prepared."

What about our own spiritual lives? Are we readying ourselves for the coming kingdom of heaven? How prepared are we to answer the King of kings and the Lord of lords?

• Have we prepared our first words to Jesus, when we see Him?
• Have we prepared our first dollar to give to a needy person?
• Have we prepared our first hug to give a family member?
• Have we prepared a phrase of asking for forgiveness, while waiting for the right moment to appear?
• Have we prepared a place for our children to grow spiritually?
• Have we lived a life so full of thankfulness that our family and friends will remember us in terms of how we love the Lord, rather than how much we love our things or riches?
• What will be the words you want engraved in the obituary page, or on our tombstones?

Thought: We have many deadlines to meet in our often packed calenders. What about our deadline for the sharing of the gospel of Christ? What is our LIFELINE for our project of sharing the love of God?

Judge Not

"Do not judge, or you too will be judged."

"Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brother's way." (Rom 14:13)

We do a lot of pre-judgment on a lot of things, people as well. Some judge others on the basis of skin colour. Even before the person is allowed to speak, things are already happening in the decision making engine of our head. Others judge people on the basis of their qualifications. If the person does not even have a degree, a skillset discount is automatically applied. Still, many people judge prospective candidates on the basis of their experience. This leaves new graduates out of any employment consideration. In social circles, judgment easily happen both consciously and unconsciously. In general, people gravitates towards their own kind, those that one feels more comfortable with. Any person(s) who does not share the common background gets filtered away as strangers or generally to be avoided.

A prominent Taiwanese professor of Psychology once shared about his early experience as a clinical psychologist in America. The moment people sees his Asian face, people automatically give a '50% discount' on his ability to accurately diagnose their condition. In other words, people judged him as ineffective simply based on skin colour. It is sad that all over the world, discrimination like this happens in different cultures. All races, all religions and all cultures discriminate in various ways. Some more, others less, but all attempt to differentiate people according to their own set of criteria. In the name of efficiency, a set of criteria is usually applied to sort out the good from the not so good. In the name of unity, people pick out those who tends to be more team-players rather than stubborn dissenters who pose a threat to cohesiveness in a group environment. When that happens, any gain in homogeneity leads to a loss in diversity.

What goes on in the head tends to dictate the actions our hands, our feet and our mouths make. When we judge a person, we make a premature conclusion that infringes on that person's freedom to be who he is created to be. Scientists have done research and concluded that people has a tendency to behave according to the expectations imposed on them. In particular, the words of a father can profoundly impact his children.
- You are useless!
- Lazy bum! Always looking for ways to shirk responsibility.
- "Bravo. Keep it up. You can do it."

When a father constantly berates his child, he is setting his child up for a rebellious and unfulfilled future. In the violent Jackie Chan movie, "The New Police Story" released in 2004, the main villain in the movie is that of a son of powerful police chief. This head of police used lots of negative language to abuse and humiliate his son, whom he deemed useless and good for nothing. As a result, the son grows up to hate cops, and spends his time dwelling in a video game environment that kills cops. Disastrously, he moved from the virtual video world and started to kill cops in the real world. The power of a father's words strikes deep and far.

Recently, I was deeply embarrassed as I watch the "Britain's Got Talent" episode featuring a humble, not too impressive looking middle aged lady called Susan Boyle. From the camera's angle, lots of people were already giving a '50% discount' on this woman's ability to croon. However, when the music starts, and the time comes for her to sing, she delivered one of the richest voices and hauntingly beautiful voices ever to be heard. Many in the audience, including the judges gave her a standing ovation. As the whole scene was played out, I cannot help but feel embarrassed that I too, were one of the guilty ones giving a '50% discount' to this plucky lady. I thought to myself: "Have I consciously or unconsciously judged others? Have I, in the process become unfair in not allowing them to be the best selves, simply by my discriminatory stance?"It is a wake-up call for me, that as a disciple of Christ, as one who desires to be part of ushering the kingdom of God for all mankind, we must be champions of diversity. More importantly, we must be chief proponents of ensuring everyone has a fair chance to succeed, to be the best they were made to be. Matthew 7:1 may come across as a negative "Do not do this" or "Do not do that." I propose that there is also a positivistic angle to it. We can avoid judging others, by helping them be the best person God made them to be. It starts by first acknowledging that only God can judge. Never us. Never discount anybody, not even a stranger.

Thought: What causes you to judge people? Have you unfairly applied different criteria to different people in your daily interactions with people? In hiring? In choosing friends or social acquaintances? Indeed, when we judge others, we are not freeing them but enslaving them according to the imperfect chains of our expectations, including those that we ourselves have trouble meeting.

"I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character." (Martin Luther King Jr)

"If you judge people, you have no time to love them." (Mother Teresa)

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Two-Second Rule

"There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven" (Eccl 3:1)

One of the key things about driving on highways is to observe the 2-second rule and establish a safe stopping distance. Under good weather and normal road conditions, a driver can use a 2-second time stop gap to leave enough space between one's car and the vehicle in front. For drivers with slower reactions, more time should be added to it. What it means is that any driver should be able to stop his or her vehicle within 2 seconds without hitting the car in front during an emergency brake. In higher speed roads, this standard gap should be increased to 3 seconds and in bad weather road conditions, it should be lengthened to 4 seconds. This rule of thumb is for the sake of both the driver as well as the driver in front. What about tailgating? In defensive driving, we can minimize the probability of a rear side collision by leaving even more space in front of us so that we can do a gradual stop, and to allow the rear driver enough time to safely stop without crashing into our boot.

Our modern life is a fast-paced one. Things can only get faster and more demanding. Microprocessor speeds are expected to rise with each succeeding generation. In computer technology, Moore's law states that the number of transistors doubles nearly every two years. This has been applied to speeds, memory capacities, volumes and many forms of measurable devices. In management sciences, people make it a point to multi-task efficiently without sacrificing productivity. People fill in all empty spaces of their busy schedule and appointments. Even lunch breaks have been turned into opportunities to solicit business deals. It is a vicious cycle. Competition pressures businesses to increase their pace and reduce their prices. Businesses squeeze employees to cut costs, to do more with less. Employees are tempted to cut corners, which endanger quality and put customer satisfaction at risk. Customers intensify the whole cycle by emphasizing price over and above loyalty. Goodwill and well meaning gestures of tolerance and patience are slowly being replaced by quick-tempered behaviour and impatience. Such actions can unwittingly feed the the hamster wheel of busyness, constantly running but never really gaining much ground. The American clergyman, William Boetcker writes perceptibly:

“If your business keeps you so busy that you have no time for anything else, there must be something wrong, either with you or with your business.” (William J. H. Boetcker)

There is a time for everything, and for every event under heaven. Unfortunately, the mad rat-race can fatally blind people into thinking that they can manage life without leaving a safety distance for themselves and for others. Fil Anderson describes his experience in his book "Running on Empty." A high achiever, he constantly worries over expectations placed by others and himself. His life is a living testimony of speeding up when his tank is running empty. His situation is a serious case of an overworked professional. He had allowed his busy lifestyle to become his sense of identity, leaving no space for others, for himself and for God to work.

"... I lived with a deep sense of loneliness, fear, frustration, and disappointment. While always busy and usually productive, I rarely feel satisfied, at peace, or at home with myself. As a natural consequence of my feelings of isolation, I was often resentful, afraid, and angry..... A deadly pattern developed: My body would fall apart whenever I broke away from the constant activity, often around holidays and vacations." (Fil Anderson, Running on Empty, Colorado Springs: Waterbrook Press, 2004, 11-12)

We need to learn to leave a "2-second rule" to unwind and not throw our work frustrations when we get back home. Otherwise, the family we claim to love only becomes an innocent punching bag for any work-related stress and accumulated steam of anger. Leave your office a little earlier each day so that you can drive slowly and not be upset by bad traffic conditions. Take a casual walk, slowly and prayerfully up the stairs, through the garden or simply pausing to chat with neighbours. You can also apply this 2-second rule for the sake of those following close behind you. Practice slowing down when others are hot on your heels, like speaking a bit slower or gentle breathing. If necessary, increase the time-space gap according to your personality. In doing so, you will grow to appreciate the wisdom of the Ecclesiastes passage, that there is a time to speed up, a time to slow down, and also a time to stop. Pause. Pray. Give thanks.

"When I stopped running and started listening to God's whispering voice, I heard my true identity declared, 'Fil, you're my beloved son, and I love you.'" (Fil Anderson, p195)

Thought: Examine your calendar. Have you placed a 2-second rule between appointments? Have you given yourself a planned time to unwind and to recover before coming back into the embrace of your loving family? Do you know how much space and time you need before any anger blows up uncontrollably? Show your loved ones you love them, by giving space and time all around you.

"Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." (Viktor E Frankl)

sabbathwalk

Overcoming Pressures

PRESSURES

Besides everything else, I face daily the pressure of my concern for all the churches. (2 Cor 11:28)

Pressures of Paul the Apostle
Sometimes I wonder at how Paul is able to overcome all these pressures. The word ‘epistasis’ (pressure) in this verse is used to describe the burden and the repeated stress upon the apostle as he was working out his ministry to the different churches. It can also mean the inward pressures the apostle exerts upon himself, out of feeling responsible for the flock he loved. He does so without complaining, without being jealous of others more fortunate than him. He compares his situation by focusing on Christ, boasting in Christ and choosing to do all things with Christ as his reference. At that time, the Corinthian church has two major problems. Firstly, there were false prophets claiming to be 'super apostles’ (2 Cor 11:5). It creates envy for people around them. Secondly, these people apparently created ‘value-added’ services to the preaching of the gospels for a fee (2 Cor 11:7). In contrast, Paul argues that he gave all of himself in the preaching (without charge) of the gospel, even ‘robbing’ other churches’ contributions to his ministry to serve them! Yet, Paul's way of overcoming pressures is simply to be able to 'boast in the Lord.'

Our Modern Pressures
Pressures are a normal thing in our modern society. We are prone to all kinds of pressures. Patrick Morley lists several modern pressures in his book "The Seven Seasons of a Man's Life." We experience performance pressure to be constantly meeting our goals and expectations from organizations, family and friends. We grapple with technological pressure when we try to do new projects with older existing equipment. We face corporate downsizing pressure in the light of cost cuts and bottom lines, often forcing every worker to do-more-with-less. We suffer from communications pressure when trying to allow individuals to work at their pace while expecting them to work within a community like environments. For those who are constantly on the move, they face traveling pressure that requires them to spend long stretches of time without their family or regular social environments. Then there is the business-deal pressure which many tries to strike a balance between profits and bottom-line thinking; distinguishing competition and cooperation; long-term vs short-term; and trying to explore new opportunities without exploiting the weak and the poor. Are the pressures faced by Paul the Apostle any different from the stresses of a typical person in modern business attire? I believe that the pressures may be the similar in many ways. However, the key difference lie in the MOTIVATION behind handling the pressures.

How do we handle pressure?
For Paul, it is clearly not materialistic in origin but that joy in the Lord. Many years ago, I learned that JOY is actually an acronym for putting Jesus first, then Others, then Yourself. At that time, I thought it was such a wonderful way to know what brings joy. Over the years, I develop an alternative, which I will share it with you. J.O.Y. is a term that comprises a noun, a verb and an adjective.

J – Journey (a noun)
Remember that whatever pressures we face, it is but a part of the journey we have been called to travel on. It could be short. It could be long. As long as it is traveling in the direction toward God, the journey will be worthwhile. Paul longs to be with Christ, yet for the fact that he feels he has a calling, he endures the pain and struggles. "For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain." (Phil 1:21)

O – Obey (a verb)
This verb is a doing aspect of our spiritual life. Apart from trust, ‘obey’ is the next most important action we have to do for God. Obedience is better than sacrifice. Better to obey one step in the Lord, instead of pretending to make one hundred self-centered steps and claiming them to be done in the name of the Lord. Paul's desire to serve is out of obedience to his calling. A prayerful person will know what instructions to obey. If we are actively obeying God, we will not be constantly caught up with the worries of the world.

Y – Yearning (an adjective)
This adjective is a great treasure of the early spiritual masters. What could encourage people to sell all they have, to give everything to the poor and to follow Christ? The early Christian saint St Antony of Egypt (251-356) is one such person. He became the father of monasticism from which we get our modern universities. It has been said that without monasticism, Western civilization would not have survived after the collapse of the Roman Empire in the fifth century. He yearns for God so much that giving up becomes a no-brainer. It is like when one person is deeply in love, he does not mind splurging on a lavish dinner on his beloved.

Overcome any pressure with joy. Consider this practice of seeing our life as a journey, obeying the Word and above all, totally yearn for God so much that everything else on this earth is secondary to the primary goal: Seeking God. May the pressures that you encounter at work, at home or anywhere else be considered secondary, compared to the all surpassing joy and peace found in Christ Jesus our Lord. Helen Keller encourages us with this:

"Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it. (Helen Keller)"

Thought: What are the outward and inward pressures of your life? How are you overcoming it? Are you doing so out of bitterness and using worldly wisdom? Or are you overcoming them with J.O.Y?

“You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” (Jer 29:13, NIV)

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Sharing our Daily Bread

When the seven years of plenty which had been in the land of Egypt came to an end, and the seven years of famine began to come, just as Joseph had said, then there was famine in all the lands, but in all the land of Egypt there was bread. (Gen 41:53-54, NIV)

The story of Joseph and his adventures has always been very fascinating. It is a story of one man, who has had many doors closed to him, and each time that happens, a window opens up. It has often been said that when God closes a door, he opens a window somewhere. If we have eyes that we will see, we will see light coming in the midst of darkness. If we have ears that will listen, we will hear despite the gloomy silence, a sweet melody of hope. In Joseph, we see a person badly treated by his brothers, unjustly blamed for a sexual offense he did not commit and as one who did not receive his fair deal even after interpreting dreams for two of his clients. In every instance, where there is a famine arising out of failed plans and unmet expectations, there is a glimmer of hope, from the finger of God. Like the land suffering from seven harsh years of famine, in Egypt and only in Egypt, there was bread. Before we jump too quickly to think that Egypt is the Saviour of the land at that time, note how Egypt received their blessings in the first place; through Joseph.

Not by Industry, Nor by Luck but by God’s Wisdom
The bread was not obtained merely from the hard work of the people at that time. After-all, the famine destroyed all the land. No land. No jobs. No food. Whatever food available is certainly not out of nowhere, for the huge food reserves in Egypt were collected meticulously due to God's wisdom that has been imparted to Joseph. In other words, without God, Egypt will perish with all the rest of the nations at that time. We can take a leaf from the lessons of Egypt and Israel. Seven years of prosperity is quickly followed by seven years of famine. This is what I call the 7-year cycle. The comforting thing is that regardless of prosperity or famine, God provides the food not only for his people, but for all who lived on the land. Throughout the years of prosperity, the people were too busy building their careers. Yet, Joseph was quietly storing up food, anticipating the 7-year famine while the rest are oblivious to the potentially devastating food crisis.

During these bleak economic times, those of us who have stored up reserves, be willing to share with those in dire straits, or to give out more to assist the needy. Put aside past grievances. Let the grace of God flow out through you. Open up your storehouses and share what God has blessed you. Let not any act of grace become an act of ungrace by holding others to ransom. Exercise grace by basic generosity that is laced with the love of God. Let your material possessions point people toward the God who has given you all things. Hopefully, as they enjoy the bread to sustain their basic livelihood, they will be led to seek the One who provides all the bread in the first place. Pray that as Christians, (who are generally more affluent,) feed the hunger, quench the thirsty and comfort the sick or the weak, more people will be led to the Giver of life, the Author of our faith and the Provider of everlasting Bread. Despite the famine of the land, there was bread in the storehouses of Egypt. Likewise, in the midst of an economic crisis, may people from all walks of life, all religious faith come to know that there will be bread, the bread of love in the storehouses of God’s people. Let this love for people stretch farther than one’s love for material goods. May the love for God overcome any desire to hoard things up for our selfish consumption. In doing so, even as we deplete our current material stocks, take comfort that we are storing up treasures in heaven, each time we give to the kingdom of God.

“It is possible to give without loving, but it is impossible to love without giving.” (Richard Braunstein)

Thought: John Wesley once said about money, "Earn all you can, save all you can, give all you can.” Earn, save, then give. Perhaps, when it comes to love, shouldn’t we reverse it? (ie give, save and earn)

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