The 5Rs of RE-tirement

TITLE:  THE 5R's OF RE-TIREMENT
Written by: Conrade Yap
Date: 6 Mar 2012
SCRIPTURE: Ecclesiastes 7:10

"Do not say, 'Why were the old days better than these?' For it is not wise to ask such questions." (Ecclesiastes 7:10)

Last week, thanks to a few thoughtful and passionate members of my congregation, we celebrated the retirement of two sisters in Christ. One has retired from the financial industry, while the other from the medical sector. Both have been very ardent Church going members, dearly loved by the people in the Church. I gave a short exhortation for these two persons and invited the rest of the people to eavesdrop. This week, I will summarize what I have said that evening, and expand a little bit on the points I made.

A) Wisdom from Cicero

Beginning with the wise words of the Roman philosopher, Cicero, I read out the following:

"It is not by muscle, speed, or physical dexterity that great things are achieved but by reflection, force of character, and judgment. In these qualities, old age is usually not only not poorer, but is even richer." (Marcus Tullius Cicero, 106-43 BC)

For a person more than 2000 years ago to speak so profoundly on the nature of the human individual, this is impressive. In our modern era, we are gravitated toward bigness, the powerful, the speedy, or any positive superlatives like great, gigantic, and gargantuan. The computing world magnifies power and speed through maxims like 'faster is better,' 'powerful is wonderful,' 'big is greater.' The consumer world advocates more as better. We see supermarkets selling goods in quantity by introducing 'huge' savings if we buy more. Hypermarkets sell things in bulk on the basis of value for money. Manufacturers bundle in a lot of stuff that we usually do not need together with some basic commodity that we need.

Unfortunately, many of us in our aging years bring these ideas into our thinking as well. We lament at our 'slowness' in getting things done when we see our younger colleagues doing more things at three times our speed. We are discouraged when we can only do one job while our juniors accomplish three tasks in a multitasking environment. We walk while they run. We single task as they multitask. We work  with frequent pauses while the young does not seem to need any rest!

(Credit: National Post)

The main problem with such a lifestyle of speed and might is this. As one tries frantically to make things happen, they risk rushing into doing things without adequate reflection. A story was told of a Chicago man who receives a request for an interview from a company located in Portland. After packing his bags and making his travel arrangements, he begins to think about how efficient he is in his logistics. Unfortunately, in his rush to get things done, he fails to clarify exactly which Portland the company is in. Upon arrival in Portland, home to the nice Western coast of Oregon, he is horrified to realize that the actual interview is in Maine, all the way to the Eastern part of the United States!

B) Wisdom, Character, and Judgment

No matter what, there are many things in life that cannot be measured by speed, by might, or by physical abilities. This is because life is not always quantitatively determined. More is not always more. Less is not necessarily bad. A recent article in ChristianityToday laments the trend of modern higher education that is introducing secular values that displaces the importance of wisdom. They focus on technical knowhow, content, and the frenetic focus on specialization. All of these quantitative measurements are accomplished at the expense of qualitative factors such as wisdom, character, and judgment.

Cicero reminds us again that there are things that old age will enable one to develop more and more. The older we become, the more we realize that the futility of life is real. We learn from one of the wisest man who has ever lived, Qoheleth in Ecclesiastes. He reminds us that it is not a wise thing to constantly harp back at the past, saying 'Why are the old days better than these?' Such good-old-days thinking is prevalent among the older folks. When they see that they are no longer as competitive as before, as efficient or as competent as in the past, they start to feel depressed. Wisely, Qoheleth reminds us that such thinking is not good. Even the mere 'asking' of such a question is rendered foolish. By being fixated on the past, not only do we bog ourselves down with unhelpful nostalgia, we miss out the opportunities to live a brand new phase of life, to reap the benefits of what it means to grow old.

C) RE-TIRE

For Christians, think retirement in terms of RE-TIRE. Like fixing in All-Season tires when Spring/Summer approaches, or Winter tires before the cold and the snow comes, re-tirement is about receiving old age as a gift rather than a dreaded stage of life. We say goodbye to the old phase and greet the new phase with a bright 'hello.' We re-tire our lives in a way that recognizes our new stage of life.

Like Cicero, we can learn to be more reflective, to appreciate more about character building, and to develop a heightened sense of discernment and wise judgment. These characteristics are sharpened even more as one reflects back on the past years of old. In other words, the years that have gone by are not to be lamented merely as the good-old-days. They are essentially past events, valuable lessons, and personal stories that help one to live better, live wiser, and live more meaningfully. Instead of good-old-days thinking, I suggest the following 5Rs of RE-TIREMENT.

D) THE 5R's of RE-TIREMENT

i) READ a little more

Far too many people are buying books without actually reading them. They have become book collectors rather than book readers. Their bookshelves are full and some books remain in a shrink-wrapped condition! Perhaps, as one prepares to slow down, they can pick up the reading habit all over again. Read widely to supplement one's life learnings by interacting with some of the wise authors. Appreciate life through the literary gems. I recommend Joan Chittister's 'The Gift of Years' and Billy Graham's 'Nearing Home' as two possible books to begin your reading quest.


ii) REFLECT a little more

The young does not have many years to reflect upon. They are too busy trying to live out their careers and lives. Not so for those who have more than 60 years of life. Ask any statistician or economist who works with numbers. They will tell you that a wider range of data will give a much more credible understanding and interpretation to any particular study. The old will have this special privilege of reflecting. They can give thanks for the good times, and to learn from the bad times. They grow as a person as they reflect more of their past. One of my favourite writers is the Danish philosopher, Soren Kiergergaard, who famously writes:

“Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.” (Søren Kierkegaard)


iii) RE-ENERGIZE a little more

Physical exercise is a legitimate spiritual discipline. In fact, the older we get, we need to make sure that our physical conditions do not be compromised. Instead of running, why not walk? After all, health experts have said that by mere walking, one can meet the exercise requirements by at least 50 percent! Moreover, if the old can keep fit, it is a valuable contribution to society as well. Healthy individuals mean less stress on the national health system. It means more money saved for society. It creates lesser burdens for the young who are already struggling with the many challenges in this tough life. As the elderly re-energizes themselves, they too are setting forth a good example for the rest of society to follow. Talk about leading by example.


iv) RELAX a little more

The common catchphrase in our conversations is "I'm busy." This catch-all excuse can be used in practically any situations. Retirement phase is a good time to simply learn to slow down and relax. Like Jesus' teachings in Matthew 6. Look at the lilies of the field, or the birds in the air. Contemplate how God has fed and clothe them. It is a great opportunity to reflect and ponder about God, and the spiritual life that we do not normally get to appreciate. Chances are, the more we relax and give thanks, the more we learn to appreciate the little things in life, and the little acts of kindness done for us.

v) REACH OUT a little more

Finally, as the old increases in wisdom, character, and discernible judgment, they can become excellent mentors to younger ones among us. They can share of their experiences. They can learn how to say yes and when to say no. As they seek to disciple a younger person by reaching out to them, they are helping to fill in the gap that the young needs. In an age where Universities, colleges, and workplaces, have become so sidetracked by competence and efficiency, the older folks among us can help to supplement these temporal things with something more eternal: Wisdom. Reach out a little more and to bless a younger chap.

No one knows more about the futility of power, money, and fame than those who have tasted it and found it lacking. No one can appreciate the temporal nature of worldly things than the elderly and older people in retirement. Remember. Retirement is not a time to dread or to lament about one's physical prowess being halved. It is less about physical but more about spiritual. Let me close with Joan Chittister's words about old age.

THOUGHT: "A burden of these years is that we might allow ourselves to believe that not being as fast or as busy as we used to be is some kind of human deficiency.

A blessing of these years is that we can come to understand that it is the quality of what we think and say that makes us valuable members of society, not how fast or busy we are." (Joan Chittister, The Gift of Years, New York, NY: BlueBridge, 2008, 12)

Grow old gracefully inside, and graciously outside.


sabbathwalk

---

Copyright by SabbathWalk. This devotional is sent to you free of charge. If you feel blessed or ministered to by SabbathWalk weekly devotionals, feel free to forward to friends, or to invite them to subscribe online at http://blog.sabbathwalk.org . You can also send me an email at cyap@sabbathwalk.org for comments or enquiries.

Thoughts on Retirement - (Part 2 of 2)

TITLE: Thoughts on Retirement - (Part 2 of 2)
SCRIPTURE: Joshua 24:1-2
Date: 13 Dec 2011
Written by: Conrade Yap

"Then Joshua gathered all the tribes of Israel to Shechem, and called for the elders of Israel and for their heads and their judges and their officers; and they presented themselves before God. And Joshua said to all the people, 'Thus says the LORD, the God of Israel, 'From ancient times your fathers lived beyond the River, namely, Terah, the father of Abraham and the father of Nahor, and they served other gods.'" (Joshua 24:1-2) 

Last week in Sabbath Walk, I remind readers not to equate retirement with financial definitions. Instead, it is an attitude that we bring to the world. We will soon pass away. The world will also pass away. The Will of God and the Word of God will remain forever. This week, we continue this reflection on retirement, with a focus on passing our spiritual baton of God's work for us. The best way to pass this baton is to live exemplary lives firstly, continually, and finally.

A) Stories in Progress

All of life is basically telling a story. All of our lives is basically the living out of our story. How well we live, is dependent on how much we lean on the Author of our stories. God is in control. If birth is the beginning of our story, death marks the end. Fully aware that his time is almost up, Joshua continues to tell the story of Israel, and how God has been faithful despite Israel lack of faithfulness. In Joshua 1, we see how even as the life of Moses ends, the story of God's redemption of Israel continues through the passing of leadership to Joshua. The times may change. People's focus may change. Even the place of dwelling of the people may change. What makes the story significant is that as far as God's love for His people is concerned, the story remains the same.

As we see the passing of the spiritual baton to Joshua, we read of Joshua's amazing declaration toward the end of the book of Joshua:

". . . as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD." (Joshua 24:15b)

B) When We Forget Our Stories

The trouble with many of us is that we have forgotten our own stories. When this happens, two possible distractions come in: Focus on Money, and a Loss of Purpose.

From my interactions with elderly people in my years of ministry, these two reasons are common. Firstly, MONEY. Far too many people, (including myself) have equated retirement with money. The government through the Old Age Security or Pension schemes use money. Insurance companies talk financial terms. Many corporations offer a retirement benefit that almost always have something to do with monetary units. Such overwhelming focus on money matters is a major distraction from true planning for retirement. Everyone worries about money. The old may worry even more. Graham continues:

"Our society places too much emphasis on money, implying that financial achievement is the main measure of a person's true success in life." (Billy Graham, Nearing Home, Nashville, TN: Thomas-Nelson, 2011, 59)

Great counsel. I think of couples whose life savings have been lost due to financial scandals such as the infamous Madoff Ponzi scheme. One couple laments about their loss, saying that they will never be able to retire. Reason: No money.

One elderly widower I know speaks constantly about money or the lack of it. She asks her children constantly for money, using her old age as the reason. She does not want to die poor. Many of us will be able to share stories of old folks in our midst who are exhibiting similar behaviour.

The question: Is money the solution to a good life of retirement?

KEY: No. The fact is this. For money-minded people, no amount of money is ever enough. For heavenly-minded people, godliness with contentment is great gain.

C)  The Loss of Purpose

The second consequence of forgetting our stories is the loss of purposeful living. A few weeks ago, I wrote on my Facebook profile the following:

Ambition Through the Ages:
Young: "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
Teenager: "What do you want to do when you grow up?"
Adult: "What is my calling as I busy myself day and night?"
Old: "What have I done?""

Is this familiar to you?

It is well known that we live in a busy and fast paced society. When times are good, this word 'retirement' is simply an after-thought. When times are bad, we dread even thinking about it. Some people retire at the age of 30 after striking a fortune. Some take retirement benefits when they sense they have passed their prime. Others retire when they are pushing 60. Some people never really retire, blaming it on the economic situation, the state of their finances, or simply an inability to let go of their familiar work routines. One couple, the Friedmans, invested their life savings in an investment fund, lost everything (US$3million) due to the infamous Madoff Ponzi scandal. With their nest-egg gone, they have no choice but to continue working in order to pay their bills and make ends meet.

D) The Life of Teresa Hsu

This grand lady of charity died on Dec 7th, 2011 in Singapore. She was 113, the oldest person in the small island country. Yet, her life emanates power and vitality. Having gone through poverty, she can understand the dire straits of people living in hunger and need. Having experienced her parent's lifestyle of giving and charity, she can learn to share whatever she had. Teresa recalls at time when she was so hungry that she had to chew and swallow grass to satisfy her hunger. She still felt hungry. What was helpful then was to satisfy the thought of her thinking that she was hungry. After that experience, she learned to share whatever she has with others, constantly thinking of people who are less fortunate than others.

Teresa Tsu (1898-2011)

In life, we are so apt to compare ourselves with the rich, the famous, the powerful, and the people high up the echelons of society. Unfortunately, when we are fixated in one direction (looking at the rich), we fail to turn around to see the other direction (looking at the rest who are not as rich). There are always needs around us. This attitude of looking out for those less fortunate drives Teresa's life. She believes in helping people with whatever she has. Some of us think that the only way we can help others is to wait for a $1million to accumulate in our bank account, or to receive something first. The truth is, we can always share. We can always give of what we have. Take a closer look, and chances are, all of us have extras to go around all the time.

Teresa's life does not develop out of a vacuum. She did not have a miraculous vision or splendid announcement from somewhere. Instead, she learns from her mother. There was a time in which someone who has not eaten for 2 days came to them for food. Immediately, her mother took the food from the table and gave it to them saying:

"We ate yesterday. They have not eaten for 2 days. They have more right to the food than we."

This begins Teresa's 'guiding light' all her life in which she is constantly thinking of people less fortunate than her. Wow! What a lady!

E) Concluding Thoughts

This is the way to retire. This is the way to rework our lives. Do not be distracted by financial limitations. Do help with whatever we can. There is always extras. Do not despair for the lack of purposefulness. Learn from people of wisdom. Learn from others who have inspired us. Maybe, as a gift to the world, to our friends and loved ones, live an exemplary life. Leave a path of faithfulness, charity, and conviction in Christ, to guide the ones younger than us. That all who come behind us will find us faithful.

There is no retirement age for the Christian. There is only constant reworking of our abilities, constant reminders of God's grace, and constant passing of the gospel baton to the next generation. Best of all, the way to retire well, is when someone else is able to tell OUR stories, as one that reflects Christlikeness.  Don't forget your own story.

THOUGHT: "How can we know - beyond a shadow of doubt - that there is life after death? The only way would be for someone to die - and then come back to life and tell us what lies beyond the grave. And that's exactly what happened when Jesus Christ rose again from the dead." (Billy Graham, Nearing Home, Nashville, TN: Thomas-Nelson, 2011, 169)

sabbathwalk
Note: If you want to see the life-giving work of Teresa Hsu, click here.

---

Copyright by SabbathWalk. This devotional is sent to you free of charge. If you feel blessed or ministered to by SabbathWalk weekly devotionals, feel free to forward to friends, or to invite them to subscribe online at http://blog.sabbathwalk.org . You can also send me an email at cyap@sabbathwalk.org for comments or enquiries.

Thoughts on Retirement - (Part 1 of 2)

TITLE: THOUGHTS ON RETIREMENT - (Part 1 of 2)
Written by: Conrade Yap
Date: 9 Dec 2011
TEXT: Joshua 13:1

"When Joshua was old and well advanced in years, the LORD said to him, “You are very old, and there are still very large areas of land to be taken over." (Joshua 13:1)

MAIN POINT: Far too many people think of retirement almost entirely in financial terms. Retirement is an attitude, not a state of being.

A) The Retirement Dream

Picture of a retired couple. (Credit: gov.ns.ca)

What is retirement to you? One common dream I have heard is this. According to this person named Johnny, this is how he describes it.

"When I grow old, I will buy myself a nice cottage by the seaside. There will be 8-bedrooms that can accommodate at least three generations in my family. Each Winter, there will be a nice log fireplace to keep our bodies warm. Each Summer, there will be grandchildren running around the house to keep our hearts warm with adoration and love. Every morning, instead of rushing to work, and engaging in office politics, I will walk hand in hand with my wife. After the walk, I will sip my Earl Grey Tea. Following lunch, I will take a nap. Then it'll be time for my second cuppa, and so on. Life will be good. Doing nothing. Nothing at all. The money in our bank should pay for all our needs until death. That's retirement life!"

Or is it?

Such a dream, while not impossible to attain, will often remain a dream. The money may be there. The bungalow may be available. The grandchildren may still come. However, if the heart is not ready, there is no retirement, only confusion, frustration, and a drastic mismatch of expectations about retirement and reality.

B) The Reality of Unreadiness

Billy Graham talks about one such 'successful' couple in their golden years. This couple achieves a lifestyle almost identical to the above dream vacation and lifestyle. The first week was a welcome joy. They freely set their own schedule, and did everything in stride. The second week was filled with more of the same. By the third week, as the novelty started to wear out, all these things started to appear boring. By the fourth week, the beach looked the same. The sunrise and sunset looked identical. The house they lived in looked more dead than alive. By the fifth week, they wondered about life. They pondered whether there is life other than simply walking the beach or napping all day long. The 'retirement dream' that they were living was not as exciting and as meaningful as they had initially thought. Five weeks of reality are more than enough to shake up all of their expectations, accumulated through more than 50 years of hard toil and labor.  It was a classic major mismatch where external reality completely misses internal expectations. This friend of Billy Graham has this to say.

"I thought I was ready for retirement, but I just didn't think it through." (21)

Bummer! Thinking we are ready does not necessarily translate into being ready. Graham makes this insightful observation that is worth our remembering.

"Loneliness, loss of purpose, depression, feelings of worthlessness, anxiety, fear of the future - these and a host of other emotions are common among retirees." (30)

Indeed. Retirement is more of an attitude, instead of a state of being. More importantly, what the world calls 'getting retired' is less of trying to achieve a certain financial independence, but more of attaining a successful transition to a new phase of life that is MORE than monetary terms.

C) Dreaded Transition?

Retirement. This 10-letter word is dreaded by some, anticipated by others, but ignored by many. Canada, like many countries in the West has a pension fund. The purpose of such a fund is to provide some financial relief for people who have retired from the workforce. Each month, eligible Canadians will get some money, depending on various factors. Persons between the ages of 65 to 70 are able to get some monthly allowance until their death. It is meant to facilitate persons transitioning from work to retirement, rather than a way to maintain their standard of living. This particular point is often missed, which is why some seniors become more skeptical about the government handouts. Such people also tend to be sarcastic about the amount, pointing to an inflation rate that is fast overwhelming anything the government gives.

As I glimpse at the half century mark, I marvel at how I am even going to survive in the present. Financially speaking, I am not sure I can even retire comfortably. Some of you may be asking:

"Conrade, you're not even 50 yet. Why are you talking and thinking about retirement?"

My reply is this: "It is never too late to plan for retirement."

This point is made even more obvious as I read the reflections of Billy Graham as he nears 'home.' At 93 years old, he continues to live strong. He maintains a heavenly focus and an energy to finish well. In what is perhaps his most retrospective book so far, he writes:

"All my life I was taught how to die as a Christian, but no one ever taught me how to live in the years before I die. I wish they had because I am an old man now, and believe me, it's not easy." (Billy Graham, Nearing Home, Nashville, TN: Thomas-Nelson, 2011, vii)

If a man like Billy Graham, who has lived such an illustrious life can say that retirement is not easy, what makes us think we can do better? Perhaps, the more 'successful' and more 'recognized' we have been in our corporate worlds, or during our prime years, the more challenging it will be as all of us approach the same destination: Death and Dying.

D) Golden Wisdom

Just yesterday, I happened to be visiting my favourite bookshop. It is one of the last surviving top quality Christian bookstores in North America. The owner is fast approaching 60. He recognizes my face, but not my name. All he remembers is what I do. I have previously assisted him to solve his computer problems. As people age, memory recall becomes a bigger challenge. Yet, when I engage him on some theological chitchat, his knowledge and ability to reason is remarkably sharp. Bless him. Being old is not just the gray hairs on the head. It is the great wisdom in his heart. Something about growing old and memory loss strikes me. Whatever we have exercised regularly will translate into better remembering.

Tiger Woods will probably remember his golf strokes for the rest of his life as he practises and competes with these skills all year round.  Bill Gates will probably remember all the major turning points in his management and founding of one of the largest software companies of the world. Likewise, Billy Graham remembers the Bible fondly and vividly, for he has preached so often, prayed so much, and studied so diligently the Holy Scriptures for so many years. The parts of the human body that we use the most, will be the last thing that we will ever forget, even as we grow old.


Implication: The less we use, the faster we forget. The more we use, the better we remember. As we grow old, this becomes more and more significant.

E) Remembering the More Important Things

Are you ready for retirement? What are the More Important Things in your life? What about relationships? What about the things that we say so often but fail so frequently to do?

Think Relationships. The long forgotten friend of yours that you happen to bump into last week. You promised to call him. Have you called him? You say that your young son is the most important gift to you from God. Have you said a word of appreciation to him? Your own spouse that you have pledged to cherish for better or for worse. Have you said a loving word of appreciation to him/her today? The colleague of yours who happens to be stressed out at work. Is your time with this colleague only restricted to office matters?

Think Spirituality. You say that you believe in the Word of God. You proclaim Christ. Suppose one day you happen to be arrested for your faith, will there be sufficient evidence to convict you that you are a follower of Jesus? Have you manifested the fruit of the Spirit? Are you living out the Beattitudes in the Sermon on the Mount? Are you doing to others what you want others to do to you? Are you praying often enough that you will never forget the prayers for the ones you love? Are you reading the Bible daily enough?

Think Wisdom. Remember Jesus' definition of the wise man from the foolish man? The latter builds his house on sand (material things, like money, etc). The former builds his house on the Rock (Christ, God's Word).

As long as we think of retirement in mere financial terms, the only things we remember are the means we use to attain these financial targets. We will remember how we make our first $1 million dollars, but forget our children's first transition into young adulthood.  We quickly remember to tell others we go to Church every Sunday, but slowly forget about the true meaning of Church beyond such Sunday attendance. We  quickly remember how we sign our first major contract, or strike the biggest business deal, but slowly forget about our first marriage vow with our spouse. We are quick to point out that there are 66 books in the whole Bible, but slow to recall what they actually say. We are quick to state the importance of prayer, but slow to confess how weak our own praying has been.

Getting ready for retirement is a long process. It is never too early or too late to prepare for it. This is because retirement is not a state of being. It is an attitude of the heart. The LORD sees Joshua getting old, and shows a gracious understanding of who Joshua is, and the work that needs to be done. Instead of asking Joshua to conquer the rest of the land that has yet to be conquered, He tells Joshua to plan ahead. He tells Joshua to mark out the land according to His instructions. He tells Joshua to remember to trust the LORD (Joshua 13:6) to make the way, while Joshua makes the plans. Joshua will die, but the Work and Word of the LORD will never die. As we think about retirement, let it not be a resignation to a frail, useless, and meaningless life. Instead, let the LORD rework our perspectives to move to appreciate our relationships (think relationship), to refocus our attention on things above (think spiritual), and to lay the foundation of God (think wisdom) for us and our loved ones.

In the words of one of my favourite Carpenters' classic: "We've only just begun. To live."

Thought: "As the older generation we should be mindful of our responsibility to pray for others. Retirement should not put us on the shelf. We should use this time in our lives to rest from our labors but lift up others who are carrying heavy loads." (Billy Graham, Nearing Home, Nashville, TN: Thomas-Nelson, 2011, 28)

sabbathwalk

---

Copyright by SabbathWalk. This devotional is sent to you free of charge. If you feel blessed or ministered to by SabbathWalk weekly devotionals, feel free to forward to friends, or to invite them to subscribe online at http://blog.sabbathwalk.org . You can also send me an email at cyap@sabbathwalk.org for comments or enquiries.